Rafathar's Reaction When Raffi Ahmad Introduces Mbak Lala's Replacement, Upset But Funny
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Kapanlagi.com - Fauzi Baadila is considered to have discredited women who are widows in his recent social media post. In his post, Fauzi Baadila, through his account @fauzibaadilla_, used the word 'janda' (widow) as the top word that has disturbed his life with insincere and flirtatious messages in his private messages.
"Please, for the widows, married women, flirtatious mothers, private accounts... with all due respect... no need for small talk and flirtatious messages through DM, please be self-aware and know your place (do you think I have a shared fantasy). Please understand, thank you, and don't be emotional... If you still continue to DM, I will block you," wrote Fauzi Baadila.
As a public figure with 417,000 followers on social media, whether aware or not, Fauzi is considered by the #savejanda community to create a negative stigma towards the word 'janda' (widow). This certainly triggers disappointment among widows. Because not all widows behave flirtatiously and seductively.
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It is very concerning when a public figure writes a sentence that actually reinforces the negative stigma towards widows. Whereas the word 'widow' is just a status that can happen to anyone, just like 'widower'.
According to Myrna Soeryo, a PR practitioner who is also the founder of the #SaveWidows community, along with the flourishing culture of misogyny and the patriarchal social system, the word 'widow' tends to be more associated with words that create negative stigma compared to the word 'widower'.
"Ironically indeed. The word 'widow' has been traded in such a way only for the interests of certain parties without considering how negative opinions are formed about the word 'widow'. And this continues," said Myrna, Tuesday (16/6/2020).
Furthermore, Myrna said that words like 'flirty widow', 'itchy widow', 'widow who steals another woman's husband' are just some of the words we often hear about widows. However, according to the Annual Report of the Supreme Court (MA) 2019, there were 485,223 newly divorced widows. This means there are 485,223 widows who can be negatively stigmatized for their new status as a widow.
"Living as a widow is not easy. They have to be able to continue being a mother (if they have children) and most widows also become the backbone of the family. They have to struggle to provide for their children or family adequately while still providing proper care," said Myrna.
"Burdening them with labels or negative perspectives will certainly make their moral burden heavier in living their lives. This will also, of course, affect the psychological well-being of their children in the future. So, are we ready to let go of the negative stigma towards the word 'widow'?" she added.
Meanwhile, according to Firliana Purwanti, a politician and observer of women's empowerment and child protection issues, 70 percent of female victims of Domestic Violence (KDRT) choose to return to their toxic marriages for economic reasons, children, including fear of being given a new label: widow.
Firliana said that many widows ultimately choose to be called single parents or hide their new status, for fear of being viewed negatively by society. "It is actually a very wrong perception to consider divorced widows less respectable than widows who are left behind by their husbands. On the contrary, divorced widows should appreciate themselves for successfully and courageously leaving toxic or unpleasant marriages," said Firliana.
(kpl/dan/nda)
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This is Rafathar's reaction when meeting Mbak Lala's replacement.
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